Book Perfume

I’m about to make a bold statement, my fellow Outlander fanatics. Episode 304, “Of Lost Things,” is my favorite episode to date. I love it even more than the wedding, more than Jamie swooping into Black Jack’s window to save Claire, more than the Battle of Prestonpans when I cried my face off, more than Jamie sending Claire back through the stones, when I also cried my face off. I. Love. It.

This episode is filled with SO MANY FEELINGS and ALL THE TEARS and also a house that looks a lot like Downton Abbey.

Plus, there’s a really cute little kid in it. So let’s get on with it and dish about the creme de la creme in this week’s Outlander Superlatives.

Episode MVP: WILLIE!

JAMMF HAS A SON! He never got to see Faith, like Claire did. He’s missed out on Brianna’s entire life—her first words, her graduation, that delicious Sweet 16 cake. And now he’s got a braw wee laddie who loves horses and wants to be a stinking papist and is super stubborn! (I wonder where he gets that from?)

Besides all that, he is just about the cutest little nugget ever.

The Real Star of the Show: Tissues

This was basically my face for the last twenty minutes of the episode.

Jamie finally gets his wee laddie, and now he has to leave him!

And then there’s Claire giving up on her search?

And Roger looking so sad in his amazing turtleneck?

I went through more Kleenex watching this episode than I care to divulge. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to hear “A Hard Rain is Gonna Fall” without falling into a pile of feelings.

Best Special Guest Star: Roger’s Adorkability

Look at this man. He is so adorkable! How much is he loving his research project?

And when he’s fixing the car and Bree asks him if Fiona is his girlfriend and he’s all, “Och!…Er…eh…comeagainnow?”

And here he is looking so darn cute in his plaid with another turtleneck underneath.

Kiss him, Bree! Get your man!

Best Form of Currency: Jamie’s Body

I love that JAMMF’s body has now become a bargaining tool. I guess being bribed by Geneva has shown him how much he’s worth, so now he’s like, “Hey, Johnny, if you promise to take care of my son for me, I’ll…you know. You know.”

And Lord John is like:

What’s next, Fraser? Offering the baker a peek at those buns in exchange for actual buns?

Best Scene Stealer: Joe’s Lunch

I know that Joe calls Claire for major medical talk, but the minute I hear “chicken cacciatore,” all focus goes out the window. I love chicken cacciatore. And evidently so does Claire.

If that’s the real reason she’s hightailing it back to Boston, I can’t blame her.

Biggest Gangsta: Lord Melton

Shallow Hal is in the house! And he’s got not one, but two ladies on his arms. This guy is living his best life. Too bad both of these ladies have their sights set elsewhere.

Best Brazen Claire Moment: Sitting at the Bar Claire

Claire has been through some stuff. Like, 18^th century battlefields and 1950s med school as a woman kind of stuff. And now she’s not supposed to sit at a bar because she’s a lady? Not cool, ye olde Scottish pub. Take those archaic customs somewhere else. La Dame Blanche will sit wherever she likes.

Hottest JAMMF: JAMMF in the Boudoir

You know, I didn’t want to be predictable here. I didn’t want to pick the JAMMF in his birthday suit when you’ve got so many other beautiful JAMMFs here, like Chessmaster JAMMF:

And Being Pensive JAMMF:

But then he had to go and tell Geneva she could watch him undress, and he gave her that beautiful speech about lust vs. love, and he also looked like this, so yeah. Hottest JAMMF.

Best Friend EVER: Lord John

Am I the only one who thinks that Lord John and Jamie need matching Best Friends necklaces? You know the ones, where the heart is broken in half and JAMMF has the part that says BE FRIE and LJG has the other side that reads ST NDS? Of course he’d give JAMMF the better half and not the one with all the consonants, because that’s the kind of friend he is. I mean, he’s marrying Isobel so he can be Willie’s father and watch over him for JAMMF! BEST FRIEND EVER.

So, what say you, Sassenachs? Did you love every ounce of this episode? Did it break your heart and make you feel all the feelings? Can you even wait until the weekend? I know I cannae!